brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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