Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Randomize