Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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