Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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