she is the kim kardashian of front butts
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
