Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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