So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
