so explain again why im purple
no
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
