Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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