Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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