Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(631): View more from New York

I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?

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(847): View more from Illinois

I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.

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(847): View more from Illinois

my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.

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(646): View more from New York

Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?

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(925): View more from California

I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.

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(408): View more from California

We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.

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(+61): View more from Australia

I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme

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(940): View more from Texas

Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.

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