Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
