Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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