38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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