Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
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