I don't usually arrange sex via text message
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize