walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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