Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Can I color on your dick again?
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
