You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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