You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize