Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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