so let's talk penis.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
