it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
She's like a pop up book from hell.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
