found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
