whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
