STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
