I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Randomize
