me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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