I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
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