Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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