im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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