were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
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