smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
