just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
