If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
