im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
