i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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