your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
