fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
