I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
