Yo dont text me then not text me
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize