OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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