Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
No subtext here. People are naked.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
