We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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