Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
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