I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
