i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
