I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize
