I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
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