yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
