how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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